Deception ,Distrust, and Dilemma

You say you love me and I want to believe, my feelings for you have been written in your book of wants. The mistrust that hovers over me is my Waterloo. The loss of heightened anticipation has gone to sleep only to wake up at another time another moment ! How do you know what love is ? Is it but a moment or is it real ? When your young and in love you run the gamut of yes to-day maybe forever and then its over ! My degree of trust has gone by the wayside as the stream carries coded messages of what I felt long ago ! You open the door and walk outside towards me to attest of my willingness to embark into unchartered waters. As the winds pick up briskly I turn my mind to the time when things were less blurred and love was carefree. My eyes turn to you as I want to be able to say yes ! My mefiance leads the way as I break away from your lack of authenticity. The unseperables now walk in different directions unable to find there way back to what they had ! The uneasiness of me becomes apparent as I try to decode what you say and what it means. Love has no desire to stay so slowly meanders towards the lighthouse as the beacon of hope diminishes . The Deception of my distrust has become a dead-end a dilemma .

I DECLARE MY LOVE !

You make me feel happy and there are moments that I am delirious ! I think of you often, the silent moments are the most lingering. When you touch me I harden and a rush goes through me like a gush of a geyser . My eyes fixate on you as you surround your presence . Vulnerability keeps me from ceding to your whims of wants ! You play the game well, not showing your hand , a bluff in store maybe. I keep my hand close to my chest as I see the reflections of your desires in the mirror. The songs of love that we would share linger and the beat of there sound vibrates continuosly. Who makes the first move , the touch of your skin permeates to mine and I shiver as the force of you creates osmosis like tendacies. I back away to relieve myself of your strength before that I should succomb to your moment of selfish pleasure. I stay in your sphere of direction knowing that the longer I am in front of you the less will I shall have to say no. Why not let me go to live a montonous blasé life of love lost to never experience again. You say you love me and want to say that I am yours. How shall I know that this is love and you are real ? Ladies and Gentleman, Madames et Messieurs I DECLARE MY LOVE !

JAMIE equals J'AIME

The first time I saw of you , I knew that something inside wanted to know more. My words of introduction slowly traced a line that would lead me to you ! I tread slowly towards you as I see your presence. My eyes close as I imagine you prance across the field as the soccer ball flies through the air ! The basketball glides through the hoop, and the weights from the gym cut through the dampness of the air left from another work-out. The physical you bristles as the sweat rolls down your torso after you leave the yard. I read your letter of request as you shyly inquire about emotions and relationships. The wrong path you took was only a detour of human error , a moment of distress and wrongdoing. You now turn the page to write a new chapter, our meeting sparks a new beginning of the now .My pain of distrust and deception has left scars but you understand as we decide to draw lines that lead us to chance ! The Ducks ,the Fighting Irish becomes our battle cry as we share our Victories and losses but remain united to the final hour. I read the words you sent about Mothers on Mothers Day, your sensitivity is a shining example of who you are, my thoughts linger on to the last word that you write. Your photos speak of you as your eyes long to say Bonjour ! I write this court metrage on the film of us and the trek that we shall embark upon. Jamie,to you I say " Je suis au rendez-vous." Jamie equals J'aime.

ABSENCE ABSINTHE

I have been away , can't really say where, there were no indications or signs, there seemed to be no sign of life but my thoughts ! My mind brought you into focus , as your face dawned the horizon. I longed that you were next to me but to no avail . Maybe it was not to be, another time and another place ! I walked awhile and saw no one ! Everything seemed to be colourless and lifeless, where was I and who brought me here ! Hallucinations danced in my head as the pounding of inner drums reached a crescendo ! The throbbing of my head seemed to diminish as I quickened my pace towards what seemed to be a hill of brush. My legs no longer supported me as I fell to the ground. I fell into a deep sleep once again. The winds of convience swept me up and carried me to higher ground ! I longed to write and then waited for your words to no avail ! Your last letter heightened my clarity of longing, warmed by your affect. The mystery of you and where I was only lowered my spirits. Green was the colour that appeared as I became sodden as your benumbed eyes could only watch with sadness my descent from on high ! My glass was empty as I my mind thirsted from absence absinthe !

Florence

Blonde is her hair, her eyes like precious stones that have yet to be worn. As she walks across the room the light followers her as she arrives to her final destination.

AMOUR

That night I walked in with a bit of a stumble but all yet so graceful ! Your eyes caught mine and I knew that this was the beginning of the end. I may have met my match with your smile and eyes that challenge my stare of curiousness. You ask me my name and I respond only to learn later that we met before. My coldness of winter left you unprepared for my response. This time our meeting was southern winds with northern kool. I sat down and you decided to follow only to say that you would return. Minutes passed and once again you reappeared to prepare the groundwork for yet a continued stance. As the time darkend you asked me to escort you to another room. The songs played as you did your dance and showed your wares, as the songs came to an end I hurriedly left to say I would come again, I did and now the rest has unfolded. Your charm of looks and physique wane with time as I stay away until your gone and then once again you return but I am there in my sleep. I feel your phsique on mine as you decide that I am yours, I stay until you fall asleep and then undue my physical being from you. The rise of the sun awakens me and I leave for work once again. I lose my time with Florence as to pass the time from you only to return hoping you're not there . I get along without you very well AMOUR.

Demon Seed, Spinning Schemes

Mefiance, is the word that I carry on my shoulder. I cannot trust you , don't say another word. You should be happy that I am giving you another chance. I am warning you get rid of those losers or it will costs you ! Your beauty is a fleet of a moment of a flash , I cannot remember the look of love, is that a glint in your eye ? Wipe that smirk of your face! You think that I am like a coat, you can put on when you need to and then put it back in the closet when your done. Your ways of seduction is wanning as I realize that you are just another suitor. Ah how I become immune to your words of convience , confident that you are to try again. I shall not ask for any more but I will not settle for any less ! What you bring to the table of conversation is but words that have lost there panache . Your level of credibility is below sea level. If you do not change you will need a life saver. I get along without you very well thinking of you when I have nothing better to do ! I thought I could trust you, that was your strong point. I don't play games where love is concerned. Allusion I apologize for taking advantage of our friendship , you saw it all and I would not listen. Your veil of hidden agendas has been raised Demon Seed Spinning schemes.

Go Bleu Blanc Rouge

The Ice awaits the moment of the end, for there will be a vainquer to-night. The teams prepare to do battle as the crowd begins to arrive. The nervousness of each player is felt as they follow in a line to touch the Ice. The lines have been drawn as the skates trace their identity of each player.The songs have been sung, the hands have clapped and the voices bellow with cheer. The music from the Organ penetrates the hollow walls of the arena. Each player takes his turn to leave his mark as the Bleu Blanc Rouge seems to cover the Ice as the Net tenders stand on guard for them. The sticks seem to draw aerial designs in the air like modern sculptures. As the skates cut into the Ice they leave there sketches on the surface. Watching the players skate is like a choreagraphie of modern dance. The outcome is yet to be known but there will be a victor, celebrations will reign until the next battle and the defeated shall have to wait for another day , another time. Go Bleu Blanc Rouge.

Spring is In the Air,Magic everywhere.

The trees are preparing their first statements of colour as the birds practice their vocals to announce the arrival of Spring. The sky paints a streak across the way for all to see. Just a dream, or is it a fantasy. My dreams are true as I believe they do. With anticipation I welcome all that there is to see. You and me are meant to be as the moon glows so bright and the shadow of our smiles light up the night. Love stretches its hands across the way finding suitors that may be of reason and desire. The hidden allure of you initates the awakening of quite murmurs. The dream of you is a dream come true. Am I fool to want you and all that you bring. I know that I walk too fast , the nights I drive too fast, we do laugh a lot.There are times that I want you too leave,I could say no but I cannot explain. I am thinking I will never let you go and that seems beautiful I know the wonder of it all. Ah in the crowd of the maddening I hear your voice.Spring is In the Air, Magic everywhere.

Susan et Raymond

The meaning of Friendship is what we are all about. Our chosen family that is a testament to all of us who exist on this earth. Many are present but few are those who leave an everlasting touch. Susan and Raymond came into my life as guests and left as dear friends that elevated to a member of my family, the chosen ones. Every smile and laughter was always genuine, her eyes would light up as she told a story, and we would all laugh and Raymond would be by her side as we would share our histories of travel, pets and our next adventure. Susan would immediately make you feel a part of the story and include you as a major actor. Habits are made to be broken but every visit was more than that,, a welcome warmth that was felt throughout Bonaparte. They both kept their child like spirit of being spontaneous and adventurous. We would ask when was their next voyage going to be elated as if just maybe we could find the time to go along. Susan et Raymond have left their mark on us for toujours. An emptiness has taken place as she has decided to take another trip, this time without us ,, but her presence is entirely there. Melancoly is at the door waiting to be invited. I continue to live as Susan would want and I continue to testify of her good works and say merci to Raymond for having shared a person of such high calibre. We shall never forget about the sincerity and human kindness of Susan. The Angels above have sounded the trumpets to announce the coronation of yet another special person Susan. Ladies and gentleman , Montréal and I raise my glass to Susan et Raymond.

Vert is the colour of your eyes

The first time was then as your smile asked to be discovered. I turned away only but to feel your eyes on mine. Vert is the colour of your eyes. The nature of the sensation is about to blossom as the winds carry your message of want. You ask me the question of your answer that you already know. I await impatiently of the photos of your existence torso nu. The words that we share prepare the meeting of the physical, as you count the time passed and what lies ahead­. The writing of your words leaves a hushed moment for a stamp that awaits the letter to send. You say "Do not be Afraid" The anticipation is grand as I can only imagine what lies aHEAD. The Babyboy replies after a letter of tardiness arrives, the belated birthday card sent by Michael refused by the authorities. Vert is the colour of your eyes. "Tell me what you like" you say, I dance from the floor as the music penetrates my body , I imagine you hiding behind the bush so to speak as I turn your every word upside down.My eyes once again analize each live picture you show me. I raise the curtain as you take the stage to show me all, my eyes rivet at your nakedness as the reflection of your shadow glimmers across my black attire. I think and feel of every movement that you make and I ask you not to stop. A rush of energy surges as we both come. Vert is the colour of your eyes.

Ct. Negroni

Your smell haunts me even before you arrive.. The colour of your wardrobe entices me to never forsake thee. I am a passionate addict of your makeup and knowingly you come on to me seeing that I will not leave but stay to the end . There is no secret of mine that I cannot share with you. Voices of others become a part of our surroundings. The DJ plays the latest house music as I begin to feel your potent ora of taste 1/3 gin.. As the night starts I smile and welcome you once again and again. Your accomplice smiles as I enjoy your everlonging hold on me. I decide that I will not leave you just yet. I have yet to tell you of my latest trite. I love the way you make me feel and when I have you in my hand I do not want it to end 1/3 dry vermouth. When I feel empty you fill me up once again. As the night advances the colour of your attire seems pale as I become intoxicated by your charm. Your faithful servant is always there to make sure that I leave not just yet. You know that we will always be inseperable and our pact is until death then we part. Your poison is my medicine of destruction 1/3 Campari. My wish is to leave you but your grip on me is ever so strong. The blackouts of my mind are yours to answer as you are my witness. I love you and loathe you with a nonchalant of passion yet your ways with me are pleasingly wicked. I shall return to see you once again Ct. Negroni.

Written Words

Alpha Dog, Alpha Male , Alpha Wolf, = socially dominant member of a group,, confident and assured of himself.. As he walks around his territory his lair of homies lower their heads as he passes by. He is the ACE and they understand. The pecking order is never in doubt by them. Welcome to his Castles called the comfort zone. To get in you must know the pass word : WRITTEN WORDS. He wears a mask that is interchangeable for the Dog,the Male ,the Wolf. I was there once but for a short time even went to the top of the mountain that was rumored to be there.Beware of the platitudes placed at your feet. How sadistic of the once grievley hurt once upon a time to return to me the favour.Beware of those who hide behind the word SELFISH and SCARED which becomes his Armour, shield, sword in the ring of life.A layer of the Alpha crumbles , The fall has been sudden and abrupt for me. I turn away from him and leave for the sands and cry " Victory, I choose to live, I choose LIFE.

The Gift of Life

I asked once I shall never ask again he says as he counts the 05/07 on the calendar the glorious day that Naomi and Bobby gave to the world this gift of life. He has drawn the attention of his fellow souls. Growing up he always knew that he would be special. The Lord Fauntleroy of Canada was to make his mark as a young manly lad. The locks of his hair would touch his shoulders as if his strength was there. From a early time people would fawn over him as he became of age. The young years my salade years when I was green always a Romantic. My eyes always curious and at any given moment a smile would break through to brighten the place where I would be. Humanity has been my focus of living and to this day the fevor is ever strong. The choices I have made have not always been the best and I have paid heavily. Love for him is éphémère a melancholy of a feeling. Black is the colour of his choice am I in a continual mourning process.? Lives lived died and has left a deep pain in his heart to never be forgotten. I am a reflection of the Taurus physically a picture of strength a contradiction of himself. This little boy lost in an adult world naive and vulnerable. My scorn is deadly and can last a lifetime, yet my eyes live for the beauty of life. The people of my chosen family are my universe I shall not forsake. I am me to you who know me, I live love and am proud, I asked once I shall never ask again.The Gift of Life.

The Secret of Ice

You welcome me with an air of coldness that only I can understand. My loyalty to you is known only by a certain few. As I arrive the stench of my equipment seems to permeate the vapeur that rises from the pond. As my stick touches the puck I realize that I am not alone, my secret is there waiting for me to make a move an unexpected play. My skates cut into the Ice as if I am about to tell all. As I open my mouth the words are silent all that I hear is the language of the Ice. The reflection of the lights become a red carpet as if an announcement is about to be made, I look around and see the jocks in the grandstand applauding with their hockey sticks encouraging me on to the centre of Ice. The snow falling seems to be a prelude to a moment that is waiting to happen. I continue skating around the arena as the wind carries me ever so close to the centre, I pause and listen as the roar of the boys seems to be in unison with their hockey sticks moving in a synchronized motion. What do I do make a pass, maybe a break away , shoot the puck and if I score the truth in the net will it be applauded or booed . For this period it is The Secret of the Ice.

Gra, Dilseacht, Cairdeas

The Angels are the children of the land , I watch them with an arresting eye as they grow their wings with joy. I am the the Taurus with a smile, my horns are for those who play the matador. The citadins have taken sides, the bets are in and the money has been counted. Blood is the colour of his hair as it reflects dingly off the sun dried parched dirt at his feet. The air has a stench of wasted beings as I slowly turn to the sortie. The applause of the maddning crowd is deafening. My satisfaction is lacklustre as the reality of my actions begins to take affect. As I continue to saunder slowly towards the gate I observe a sea of redness that seems to quinch the thirst of the earth below. Revenge is sweet and these games are all that I have left to play so I play to win. As the coins are being placed into the cloth woven sack I am taken aback by the heaviness of it all. Another good days work , another victim, I smirk at those who would wish me dead at least not to-day. I return to whence cometh my help ,I see you there waiting patiently with a sigh of relief not knowing if yesterday was the last time. I take off my shoes and put my feet up with much slowness as I feel the pain of yet another victory. I have not been forsaken and I lift up my eyes to the out stretched heavens and feel the quiet winds as the Angels flutter their wings in unison . The stillness of moment makes me realize how much we are alike as I see the future in your eyes . I place my hand in yours as you say Gra, Dilseacht, Cairdeas.