Deception ,Distrust, and Dilemma

You say you love me and I want to believe, my feelings for you have been written in your book of wants. The mistrust that hovers over me is my Waterloo. The loss of heightened anticipation has gone to sleep only to wake up at another time another moment ! How do you know what love is ? Is it but a moment or is it real ? When your young and in love you run the gamut of yes to-day maybe forever and then its over ! My degree of trust has gone by the wayside as the stream carries coded messages of what I felt long ago ! You open the door and walk outside towards me to attest of my willingness to embark into unchartered waters. As the winds pick up briskly I turn my mind to the time when things were less blurred and love was carefree. My eyes turn to you as I want to be able to say yes ! My mefiance leads the way as I break away from your lack of authenticity. The unseperables now walk in different directions unable to find there way back to what they had ! The uneasiness of me becomes apparent as I try to decode what you say and what it means. Love has no desire to stay so slowly meanders towards the lighthouse as the beacon of hope diminishes . The Deception of my distrust has become a dead-end a dilemma .

I DECLARE MY LOVE !

You make me feel happy and there are moments that I am delirious ! I think of you often, the silent moments are the most lingering. When you touch me I harden and a rush goes through me like a gush of a geyser . My eyes fixate on you as you surround your presence . Vulnerability keeps me from ceding to your whims of wants ! You play the game well, not showing your hand , a bluff in store maybe. I keep my hand close to my chest as I see the reflections of your desires in the mirror. The songs of love that we would share linger and the beat of there sound vibrates continuosly. Who makes the first move , the touch of your skin permeates to mine and I shiver as the force of you creates osmosis like tendacies. I back away to relieve myself of your strength before that I should succomb to your moment of selfish pleasure. I stay in your sphere of direction knowing that the longer I am in front of you the less will I shall have to say no. Why not let me go to live a montonous blasé life of love lost to never experience again. You say you love me and want to say that I am yours. How shall I know that this is love and you are real ? Ladies and Gentleman, Madames et Messieurs I DECLARE MY LOVE !

JAMIE equals J'AIME

The first time I saw of you , I knew that something inside wanted to know more. My words of introduction slowly traced a line that would lead me to you ! I tread slowly towards you as I see your presence. My eyes close as I imagine you prance across the field as the soccer ball flies through the air ! The basketball glides through the hoop, and the weights from the gym cut through the dampness of the air left from another work-out. The physical you bristles as the sweat rolls down your torso after you leave the yard. I read your letter of request as you shyly inquire about emotions and relationships. The wrong path you took was only a detour of human error , a moment of distress and wrongdoing. You now turn the page to write a new chapter, our meeting sparks a new beginning of the now .My pain of distrust and deception has left scars but you understand as we decide to draw lines that lead us to chance ! The Ducks ,the Fighting Irish becomes our battle cry as we share our Victories and losses but remain united to the final hour. I read the words you sent about Mothers on Mothers Day, your sensitivity is a shining example of who you are, my thoughts linger on to the last word that you write. Your photos speak of you as your eyes long to say Bonjour ! I write this court metrage on the film of us and the trek that we shall embark upon. Jamie,to you I say " Je suis au rendez-vous." Jamie equals J'aime.

ABSENCE ABSINTHE

I have been away , can't really say where, there were no indications or signs, there seemed to be no sign of life but my thoughts ! My mind brought you into focus , as your face dawned the horizon. I longed that you were next to me but to no avail . Maybe it was not to be, another time and another place ! I walked awhile and saw no one ! Everything seemed to be colourless and lifeless, where was I and who brought me here ! Hallucinations danced in my head as the pounding of inner drums reached a crescendo ! The throbbing of my head seemed to diminish as I quickened my pace towards what seemed to be a hill of brush. My legs no longer supported me as I fell to the ground. I fell into a deep sleep once again. The winds of convience swept me up and carried me to higher ground ! I longed to write and then waited for your words to no avail ! Your last letter heightened my clarity of longing, warmed by your affect. The mystery of you and where I was only lowered my spirits. Green was the colour that appeared as I became sodden as your benumbed eyes could only watch with sadness my descent from on high ! My glass was empty as I my mind thirsted from absence absinthe !

Florence

Blonde is her hair, her eyes like precious stones that have yet to be worn. As she walks across the room the light followers her as she arrives to her final destination.

AMOUR

That night I walked in with a bit of a stumble but all yet so graceful ! Your eyes caught mine and I knew that this was the beginning of the end. I may have met my match with your smile and eyes that challenge my stare of curiousness. You ask me my name and I respond only to learn later that we met before. My coldness of winter left you unprepared for my response. This time our meeting was southern winds with northern kool. I sat down and you decided to follow only to say that you would return. Minutes passed and once again you reappeared to prepare the groundwork for yet a continued stance. As the time darkend you asked me to escort you to another room. The songs played as you did your dance and showed your wares, as the songs came to an end I hurriedly left to say I would come again, I did and now the rest has unfolded. Your charm of looks and physique wane with time as I stay away until your gone and then once again you return but I am there in my sleep. I feel your phsique on mine as you decide that I am yours, I stay until you fall asleep and then undue my physical being from you. The rise of the sun awakens me and I leave for work once again. I lose my time with Florence as to pass the time from you only to return hoping you're not there . I get along without you very well AMOUR.

Demon Seed, Spinning Schemes

Mefiance, is the word that I carry on my shoulder. I cannot trust you , don't say another word. You should be happy that I am giving you another chance. I am warning you get rid of those losers or it will costs you ! Your beauty is a fleet of a moment of a flash , I cannot remember the look of love, is that a glint in your eye ? Wipe that smirk of your face! You think that I am like a coat, you can put on when you need to and then put it back in the closet when your done. Your ways of seduction is wanning as I realize that you are just another suitor. Ah how I become immune to your words of convience , confident that you are to try again. I shall not ask for any more but I will not settle for any less ! What you bring to the table of conversation is but words that have lost there panache . Your level of credibility is below sea level. If you do not change you will need a life saver. I get along without you very well thinking of you when I have nothing better to do ! I thought I could trust you, that was your strong point. I don't play games where love is concerned. Allusion I apologize for taking advantage of our friendship , you saw it all and I would not listen. Your veil of hidden agendas has been raised Demon Seed Spinning schemes.